THE UNINVOLVED-LISTENER - 161/365

assumptions are made

with ears tuned

to one side of the story

Question:

How do you validate your information?

Clay Ingredients:

Super Sculpey

THE KNOW-IT-ALL - 144/365

to assume to know the answer

is to follow a path that leads to nowhere

Question:

What are your assumptions?

Clay Ingredients:

Sculpey Translucent

Holtz Distress powder (peeled paint)

Herbs: Dill

THE SCOREKEEPER - 125/365

"It's your turn...I called last time so I'm just going to wait to see how long it takes before you call me. I bet you don't call...I bet I'd never hear from you if I didn't call you. We'll just see."

My Reflection:

I'll admit there are times when I am more comfortable making an assumption than I am with direct communication. "Oh I don't need to ask that question..I already know the answer," I'll say to myself.

Perhaps what I'm failing to realize is that it isn't the "answer" that is most important - but rather the willingness to ask the question that becomes the mortar between the bricks of a strong relationship.

Question:

When do you assume you know the answer?

Clay Ingredients:

Sculpey Translucent

Holtz Distress powder (black soot)

THE FACE READER - 79/365

"What's the matter you look frightened? Do you want to talk about it? Is there anything I can do to help?

What do you mean you're just reacting to the look on MY face - I'm just concerned about the look on YOURS."

My Reflection:

I wonder how many times I've mis-read someone's facial expression?

I think they're bored but they're sad, I think they're angry but they're scared, I think they're happy but they're hurt. So, why not "ask" instead of assuming I know the answer simply by the look on their face?

What if a "mis-read" face could be a missed opportunity to build a stronger bond and a closer relationship? Wouldn't that be worth taking the time to check my assumption for accuracy?

Question:

What do you do when an expression "speaks" to you?

THE EAVESDROPPER - 64/365

"I've got my antenna up so I can hear EVERY word!

Sh...if you keep talking to me, I might miss something important - some tidbit of information that I can collect and use later on.

Besides, if I don't listen in, how will I know what people REALLY think? No one ever tells the truth - and I need to know the TRUTH."

My Reflection:

I often wonder, what is the "truth?" Is it information based on "facts" or information based on my assessment of the facts?

I've noticed that when I jump to a conclusion that I "know" the truth, the less likely it is to be "the truth." On the other hand, the more questions I ask, the more facts I uncover, the closer I come to an accurate assessment of the situation which allows me to create a truth that is right for me.

I've learned that the "truth" doesn't reside in one location - it hides in many different places at the same time and only reveals itself when it is genuinely pursued.

Question:

How do you pursue the truth?

THE UNAWARE'ER - 37/365

"What nail? I have no idea what you're talking about. How could there be a nail in my head? WHY, would there be a nail in my head? That's just silly...do you think I would be here talking to you if there was a nail in my head? Would I be smiling if there was a nail in my head? NO... so obviously, there's no nail in my head...it's just you, making assumptions AGAIN!"

My Reflection:

Okay, so a nail in his head is a little over the top...but every time I make an assumption I could kick myself - particularly the times it seems SO OBVIOUS that I "assume" I'm not making an assumption!

What is the saying...."if you smell smoke then there's probably a fire"? I guess if you smell smoke it could be a weenie roast but a fire's a fire...right? Maybe not.

Every time I make assumptions I get into trouble. I always need more information but, of course, I don't know that I need more because I "assume" I have all the information I need. When will I learn...how can I learn...is there something I can do?

What if I ask just one more question...just ONE MORE when I think I have all the answers? Of course the key is to REALLY ask - ask to understand - to gain more information NOT to substantiate my assumption!

Question:

Do you "ask" or do you "assume?"

THE AVIATOR 13/365

"Wow...it's pretty amazing up here - and flying through these cotton balls is a lot easier than I thought it would be! They're not as solid as they seem.

Uh oh, that train is going to hit that car....HEY...WATCH OUT! Whew...that was close. It's a good thing I'm up here watching out for all this stuff. No telling what would happen if I didn't have this bird's eye view."

My Reflection:

Assumptions will get me every time. I'll think for sure that I have something figured out and what I thought was as dense as a cotton ball turns out to be as airy as a cloud.

I also get tripped up on bird's eye views. Based on what I see at a distance, I think I know what will happen like that train and car collision and then as The Aviator did, I'll try and sound the alarm. I've learned, however, that life isn't meant to be played in the air. It's meant to be experienced on the ground where I can't always see the big picture, know where I'm going or what calamity might be ahead. So, why am I tempted to put those glasses on time and time again and head for the sky? I guess it's just so much easier up there where I "think" I can see.

Question:

Where do you like to hang out?

THE POSTULATOR - 3/365

“I don’t like this. I don’t like being looked at and judged - it makes me uncomfortable. No one really knows me so why do they make so many assumptions? I know for sure what they're thinking. How do I know? I read minds that’s how. How do I read their minds? Well, I can just tell by looking at their faces."

My Reflection:

Some times the only thing I have to go on is the look on someone’s face, the tone of their voice or perhaps their body language. I pride myself on “reading” people and reading them really well. But do I? All of us have a story to tell but most of us don’t “tell it” - we “wear it” instead. We wear it on our face, body and in the timber of our voice. But that image or sound doesn’t really tell the story - it’s only the introduction. Perhaps the better I am at asking questions, the less I’ll have to rely on assumptions.

Question:

What questions do you ask?